Independence

As the United States is celebrating its independence this week, the thought came to mind how do empaths establish their independence from the world.  The following is from a empath friend of mine, Laura Ryder.

How we define ourselves is crucial to establishing the boundaries we need to understand our role in the world. The alternative is to just meld in to the background until there is no distinction between us and the world.  I give you three steps to take to achieve independence: grounding, knowing your abilities and disabilities, and establishing your role in the world.

When it comes to getting to know ourselves, grounding or centering is a place to start.  What grounding does is let us get to know our own feelings rather than other people's feelings.  At certain times in life it's good to get reacquainted with your feelings especially when you are trying to deal with issues your struggling with.  In this way we grow to become our own person, rather than being dictated what to be by the world.  Thus we can start to establish our independence.

Knowing your abilities and disabilities are essential to being independent.  Some people may equate these to strengths and weaknesses.  For the empath it's more specific.  Every empath have disabilities.  That is those things that make us hurt, or act crazy.  Usually these are due to external sources like other people, animals, plants,...etc.  The key is to learn about these weaknesses to understand how to use them in a way that they become abilities.  This is a long term proposition, and every empath is different.  Gathering a repertoire of abilities is important for the empath to be empowered and gain independence.

After knowing ourselves and gaining abilities, empaths need to figure out their role in the local world they live in.  Careful thinking and reading people will come in handy for this task.  Some questions to consider are: How do I help my co-workers; Where do my family need help; How can I assist my community.  Empaths are in unique position to be able to read people more readily than others.  As such we can realize problems and concerns of others.  Though sometimes its enough to vocalize the concerns, a better way is to help alleviate concerns by purposeful acts of kindness.  Doing such may keep you from the spotlight and still effect help.  When empaths are spotlighted, other people tend to put demands on them which is not good.  Remember, you want to keep your independence so you want to avoid the spotlight as much as possible.  Encouraging, coaching, listening are some examples of acts of kindness.  Again, every empath is different and every situation is different.

As an empath, forging your own independence takes courage, diligence, and creativity.  Using grounding, knowing your abilities and disabilities, and establishing your role can set any empath on the road to independence from the world.  I did not mention here what to do when you have relationships your uncomfortable with.  That is another essay.